Proverbs 8:11

Addiction Forgiveness Acceptance

The word trust means an assure reliance on the character, ability or strength of someone or something.. To place confidence ~ expect confidently.
Example: When I go to my car and turn the key, I know my car, I know it will start. I do not question, wonder or hope it starts, I have developed trust in my car. As we develop a relationship we become assured of Gods character, His ability and His Word. His Word is truth.
Truth is defined as sincerity in action and/or character and utterance: Fidelity, constancy, the state of being the case; Fact.
This Tuesday, I will focus on the Truth.
I can rely and trust God. He is working things out. He may be behind the scene where I can’t keep my eye on it, I can’t control it which is scary because I am human, I want to work things out myself. Which is funny on account I myself have made a pretty big mess of my life! I have scrambled around, I have tried to manipulate things and people, force my own agenda and control situations and it always blows up in my face! Instead of trying harder today and moving forward I will trust harder
“Thus speaks the Lord God of Israel, saying; ‘Write in a book for yourself all the Words I have spoken to you’
Jeremiah 30:2
God revealed that scripture while I sat in Dallas County Jail waiting to go to prison. This is the beginning of all He spoke to me while in prison. I rode my bunk as they say for two years, and studied. My mom, bless her heart, sent me dictionaries to define words that stuck out or that I felt compelled to understand on a deeper level, she sent me devotionals and when there was no more room in my locker, she hand wrote me from Strongs Concordance. Thank you momma! It was because you kept me in pen and paper that I could write these down.
Luke 9:62 But Jesus said to him, " No one having put his hand to the plow and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.
Luke 9:23,24 Then He said to them all " If anyone desires to come after me, let him deny himself, take up his own cross daily and follow me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose his life but whoever loses his life for my sake will save his life" Mark 8:37 Or what will a man give in exchange for his life?
Luke 17:32 Remember Lots wife? He who seeks his on life will loose it. Genesis 19:26 But Lots wife looked back behind her and she became a pillar of salt
This regards to wanting to want to follow Jesus but still having other priorities and or desires. Or perhaps perhaps looking back on an addiction you have broken free from and what happens when we think too much about something? We are more than likely going to to go back to it. Our thoughts eventually become actions.
Our lives will never be greater than the cause we live for, ourselves or God. Do you desire earthy love and recognition, or heavenly love and recognition? Happiness or Holiness? Favor with man or God?
Isaiah 26:3 "You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on you, Because he trusts in you"

Today my peace and joy come from the Lord. I should say that everyday! I am going to start saying that, even when I don’t feel that way because feelings are fickle. Here’s a fact I can rely on. He chose me! When I was ten and read Psalms 23 I knew, I know that I knew because I cried big tears, big gulping air, snot running down my nose, loud cries of joy leapt from me! That chapter was for me at that moment. Jesus introduced himself to me in my bedroom. So much love surrounded me and I knew I wasn’t alone. The more I read, the more I study, I see in scripture that it is not me that suddenly wanted to know this mysterious man. God chooses whomever He chooses. He picked me! I am wanted and loved and worthy of His love because yes, He first loved me! The desire to know Him comes from Him. The desire to worship Him comes from Him! I can rest in His perfect love. I can’t earn it. I don’t deserve it. I only have to receive this gift.
Last night that revelation kinda hit me again. I have asked God to help me not worry, stress and fret. So, if your working on an area of your body, if your building a muscle, your working it, your sore, you might hurt or ache as the area you are building gets really worked, the same applies to your heart, or spirit. I am strengthening my faith, well, God is. So of course that means the testing of my faith is painful! Thank you Jesus that you will not ever give up on me! My resolve to stay the the of time and the testing of my faith has been renewed. I am ok! I am better than ok, I am highly favored! I am blessed going in and blessed going out. I am above only and not beneath! I am sealed with Gods Holy seal. I am the bride of Christ! I am my beloveds and He is mine!
Well, once again I’m in a lesson. My county insurance dropped me. My boyfriend bought me additional insurance so the county dropped me but the paid for insurance doesn’t cover physical therapy. My ACL is severed and I have a grade 11 MCL tear so I need the therapy. He is stressed. I was stressed and even heart broke.
I’ve been told once my knee is healed I have to leave my residence. So now I’m in a pickle. God, what do you want me to do?
Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding
I do not understand my circumstances but I do believe, rely, trust and have CONFIDENCE in my Heavenly Father that whatever His plans are, they are good, His thoughts toward me are good and He will never leave me or forsake me!
Before I was a daughter, a wife a mother, a friend or a girlfriend, I was Gods. I am a child of God. There is no one who cares for me more. I lay this lesson, this testing of my faith, at my Kings feet. Here’s my mess. Do with me whatever you will, for it is your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Thank you Jesus. Give me this day my daily bread and lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from the evil one. Forgive me my debts as I forgive my debtors, for yours is the kingdom!
Why is Friday so far from Monday and yet, Monday so close to Friday?
Unknown
Another week has passed. I looked away for just a moment on what was it? Monday? Now, it’s Friday. As fast as the week goes, the weekend goes faster. This is exactly why I like to take stock, breathe, and be mindful. Of it all. Everything. Everyone. Appreciate the time because time is it’s own master. Or rather, God is. Our times are in His hands. I have learned that I worry. I fret. I Brood, bother and fuss. Over anything, everything, nothing and then some! I make lists. Lists of lists I should make! Like a dog gnawing on a bone, I think and think and think of things I need to think! So, I am relearning to lessen my load, lighten my burden by casting my cares, my worries…all my what if’s at my Jesus’s feet. He is the Author and Finisher of this life. There is nothing I could imagine or plan that could compare to His glorious plan for me. Today, I am mindful of how small I am, but a vapor and all that I know will be gone. I am going to be thankful and relax knowing that He has everything under His control and it is all in His time…not mine!
My times are in your hands; deliver me from the hands of my enemies, from those who pursue me. Psalm 31:15

If my time is in His care then I will not fall
You are no accident, you were planned and prayed for! There is nothing about you not known and noticed by God, I as your mother am a mere steward of you, you are Gods child first!
Mommy
I love you, oh how I love you! You are so amazing! I could sit and listen to you for hours. I could watch you, mesmerized forever! I love how God made you! You are so strong, stubborn and smart. I am praying for you, everyday. I am believing for you, the best. You have so many amazing things that God has in store for you! Your life is an adventure and the bad things that come your way are mere stepping stones. My baby girl, my lovely young woman, don’t be sad, “Awake, Awake! Put on your strength, O daughter! Put on your beautiful garments, O Jerusalem, the holy city! For the uncircumcised and unclean shall enter you no more! Shake yourself from the dust; Arise! Sit down O Jerusalem! Loose yourself from the bonds of your neck, O captive daughter of Zion!” Isaiah 52 God has given you the freedom and the Power in His Name to loose yourself and to shake yourself from dust and bonds that you find yourself in. When I realized this I was in prison. God opened up the eyes of my heart, He took a couple more scales off my eyes, I think I still have a few scales because I am still realizing many things lol, anyway, I began to see that yes, He will rescue us but we must do our part. Rise up daughter! The power that raised Jesus from the grave is inside YOU!!!!

Abraham was called at the age of 75 to be the father of many but was sent at the age of 100 to have the son that God called him to have. He and Sara tried, in the flesh and on their own to have a child and that was not the child God called him to have, Ishmael was born in the flesh and eventually banished to the desert. God gave Ishmael a promise of a nation of his own, but Isaac was whom God established His covenant.
Moses was called I believe at birth to lead the Jews out of captivity. He moved in the flesh thinking to kill an Egyptian that was abusing a Jew, which was his brethren. He fled and became a shepherd at the age of 40 and it was another 40 years before God sent him to free the Jews. By then he had developed a speech problem and didn’t feel he was up to the job! God waited until he was humble!!
God waited 14 years to give Abraham his promise, Moses waited another 40 years. I know God has promised me somethings, I’ve had several prophetic words, over several years, with different people. These promises take time, but we are told to write our visions and promises down, to wait for them, they will come at their appointed times. Thank you Father, that your word gives me hope. I am not too late. I haven’t been a mistake and my mistakes are not too big for you! In fact, I am excited! I am expectant! I am filled with anticipation! What God can and will do no man has seen before! He is doing a new thing!
The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things revealed belong to us and our children forever, that we may follow the words of this law
I read my devotional today and it convicted me of my worry and anxiety. As if I can do anything in and of my own. I am going through a difficult time in trusting God right now. I need to stop wrestling with myself, my past, my regrets, I must learn to forgive myself….oh the list goes on. To all my friends and followers who know I have struggled with forgiving my bf, I want to say I have processed my pain and am walking in love again. I have many questions and doubts but I am giving them all to God. I created quite a mess of my life, but I also am deeply in love with Jesus. So, as I go about my day, I let my God figure out my mess. He does work all things out for the good! I study His word and I sing to Him and I am resting at His feet.
I am my Beloveds and He is mine
Song of Solomon 2:16
Today I purposely choose my thoughts. When I wake up mad, I choose to let it go. I choose peace over pride. I choose love over hate. This doesn’t mean I am a door rug or that I do not matter. I matter to the one that settles matters. If a known “Christian” and leader in the community chooses mean words to say and if this same person chooses to cast me aside and out, then I trust God to make matters right for me because I am precious to God. I have to find a new place to live because my covering is lifted. I really am not worried, I know God is taking me not away from a great place but taking me away from the wrong place. It helps to know this is n my soul, it helps me not be angry and the complete unjust words thrown at me. We all pay for the things we say and do, ad if you have never had to pay because your parents paid for you, you wont understand this. All you think about is what you feel and what you think you deserve We all deserve death but we are saved by GRACE, no one is above his or under it. We are saved!!!!!! I am SAVED!!!! I am worry free this Tuesday!!!!
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