#Bloganuary

What does it mean to live boldly?

”To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”

Oscar Wilde

There was a time a few short years ago, when I was making my living by committing crimes, where I really believed I was living my best life. I lived by a code of conduct, I had my hand in a lot cookie jars so to speak. I multi tasked if you will. Anyway, for a while maybe I was living my best life, considering. I always had lots of cash, I was my own boss. I ran my life like I had a legit job. I called customers and promoted my goods, I had a daily log of what came in and what went out. I took profits from one area and reinvested into other areas of my said liking or interest. I collected on debts or accounts owed and kept client relations on a happy note. It was an adventure. Or misadventure. Reckless is what it was. I wouldn’t want to do it again, live like that but I did do things I never thought I’d do, experienced a way of life that is completely outlaw and made some friends with the oldest coolest cats I know. Real OG.

Now, I have to ask myself, am I living boldly now? No. I am living quietly. I am resettling into life. Readjusting. My boyfriend Andy and I don’t go out a lot. I am trying to figure what to do with my life as we speak, poor Andy, he is trying to give me ideas. Its a lot of work, being my boyfriend. As I reflect on this and realize I could be living better, perhaps I will take a moment now and mindfully look at my life. Where could I improve on something, anything? I have to keep into consideration my knee and leg are still unable to carry my weight, so what can I do? I cant drive yet. Well, I did start this blog, or rather just started paying attention to it. So maybe right now, I am doing the best version available of living boldly. I started writing again. I started playing with graphic art again. I think this mindful moment I just had was very productive!

Considering my current situation, I am living boldly! I am taking risks when I post something I write. I love to write. Right now, this is my best life! I am so glad I did today’s prompt. I wrote myself into my my own truth I hadn’t taken the time to see and I am happy to say, this is living boldly for me!!